Your Right To Sex Is Not More Important Than Your Child’s Right To Life

Sex Choices

As hundreds of thousands of women participate in the yearly March For Life in Washington DC, hundreds of thousands more will claim that those who oppose abortion are trying to “punish” women for having sex.

“No birth control is 100% effective, and therefore there will always be a need for abortion!”

Over the past several years, as I made my own journey from pro-choice to pro-life, I have heard this argument made many times. In fact, I’ve probably made it myself.  After all, it is true that no form of birth control is 100% effective, with the exception of a full hysterectomy, which is not truly available nor practical for myriad reasons.

Yes, I will even include complete sexual abstinence as not being 100% effective for the sake of making a fair argument, so let’s get that out of the way.

Abortions performed on victims of sexual assault and incest make up 1.5 percent of total abortions, according to a 2004 study by the Guttmacher institute – which refers to themselves as “committed to advancing sexual and reproductive health and rights in the United States and Globally” – hardly a biased pro-life source.

Even if we look at statistics of women who have been raped, became pregnant, and who may or may not have sought abortions, even liberal estimates put the incidence of pregnancy happening from rape at around 5%.

This statistically tiny group of “hard cases” is used constantly in abortion discourse, as though we should decide 95% of abortion regulation based on the unique situations of 1.5-5% of women. This article is not about these truly difficult and heartbreaking cases. I believe abortion is always an evil, however, in rape and incest it may be an acceptable though regrettable evil.

But I digress.

We are talking about consensual sex here.  An act that is expressly intended for the purpose of procreating. Sex potentially makes babies. All women know this. Therefore, when they choose to engage in sex, they are consenting to the possibility of pregnancy. I know this statement may be seen as offensive, but it’s also a clear logical fact.

In my view, once you strip away the false statistics, bad science, and shrieks of “her body her choice!”, the argument made in favour of abortion boils down to a few basic points.

One, that zygotes, embryos, and fetuses become human based on women’s feelings versus any sort of objective standard.

Two, that the onus is somehow upon the most voiceless class of human in society to prove their own personhood to avoid being slaughtered.

And three, that a woman’s right to have sex is more important than an unborn child’s right to live.

For the sake of brevity, I will be addressing point number three. And in fact, I think that the third point may actually be the most insidious of them all. It is the primal expression of the decline of humanity and how we view our own indulgences over the most basic human rights when it suits us, wrapped up into a single contentious issue.

It is undeniable that that sex is an important part of the human experience. In fact, it is considered a physical need according to Maslow’s hierarchy – although this is often debated.  Still, I make no claim that sex is a small issue or that abstaining from sex is as akin to choosing not to eat meat.

Not having sex isn’t a walk in the park.

Fortunately, it’s only necessary to abstain from sexual activity if a woman’s own choices make it so. There are so many simpler solutions that it boggles my mind that I even need to write this article.

First, one idea.

Dare I say it?

Have sex with a committed partner. Heck, go full “family values” and have sex with a man you’re married to. Create a situation in your life where if you were to get pregnant it “wouldn’t be the end of the world”.  There is the simplest answer, right in front of you, which allows you to have sex whenever you want without an ultra-strict birth control regimen.

If you’re having sex with casual or multiple partners, let them know that you will not get an abortion if an accident were to happen. And then protect yourself from pregnancy as much as humanly possible.

Use birth control. Not one kind. Multiple types. Use a condom – which will also help to protect you from STIs.  Use a hormonal contraceptive. Throw in a spermicide product. Diaphragm, perhaps? There are dozens of options. Learn about them, and use them properly.

A bit of extra work?

Too bad. If you truly fear pregnancy to the level that abortion would be your choice if it were to occur, you would truly do everything in your power to avoid pregnancy.  If you are unwilling to do this, you are using abortion as birth control by default.

And if all of this fails—which with even my rudimentary understanding of statistics, I would place a bet that it is microscopically unlikely—there’s always carrying the pregnancy with the intention of adoption.

If you feel these options are not viable, I hate to tell you, but you have absolutely zero business having sex.

I come to you as a mother and a woman who has sex. I do not intend this article to be hurtful to women who have had abortions – though I believe abortion is evil, it is an evil that is being pushed on society from the very upper echelons. Women who have had abortions are not my enemy – my only enemy is a culture that celebrates irresponsibility even to the point where it means we must cause death to maintain our pleasures.

I am speaking mainly to women here, and although I don’t claim to speak for women, I do have a bit of  understanding on this issue.  The complexities of sex are different for us than they are for men, and there’s nothing we can do about that. It’s unfortunate. It sucks. Biology is unfair.

It’s not easy to accept that every time you engage in sex as a woman, you are creating the conditions within which a pregnancy may occur. This is a great deal of power, and a part of womanhood that I personally find deeply empowering, a thought which has only grown since experiencing pregnancy and birth for myself. But with this power, the power to create and sustain human life, comes the responsibility to safeguard it. Even when it hurts.

It isn’t easy.

Abortion Rally

Abortion Rally

But let’s take my argument to the extreme. Again, something that you will not be faced with if you make other responsible choices.

Even if I told you that you could never have sex again for the rest of your life, that fate is a lot easier and a lot better than being torn apart in your mothers womb and denied the very chance to take your first breath because your mother decided an orgasm  and intimacy was more important.

Your right to sex does not outweigh your child’s right to life.

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About the Author

Stefanie MacWilliams
Stefanie MacWilliams is a dissident Canadian millennial, mom, buffalo sauce afficianado, and right-wing political troublemaker. She co-owns (and writes for), hosts the Right Millennial show on Youtube, and can be found frequently on her twitter account @StefMacwilliams or you can email her at

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